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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29079063">Cedar: Lost Years</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/CloakedStoryteller/pseuds/CloakedStoryteller'>CloakedStoryteller</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>B^2: The Times Between [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dungeons &amp; Dragons - All Media Types, Original Work</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>A snippet of Cedars backstory, Attempted Sexual Assault, Gen, from our campaign</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 10:34:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,269</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29079063</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/CloakedStoryteller/pseuds/CloakedStoryteller</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Cedar Ertoris, magicless black sheep of her sorcerer family, became a warlock when her patron offered her powers during her family mansion's burning. Leaving the disapproval and scorn of her family behind, she works to find herself while trying to stay alive while on her own. In the time before she met her friends, Cedar tries to make a difference on her own, despite her low self worth and her patron's cruelty.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Cedar Ertoris &amp; Wendonai</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>B^2: The Times Between [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2133465</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Cedar: Lost Years</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This takes place in the couple year gap between Cedar becoming a warlock and striking out on her own, and the beginning of our campaign. Cedar is an elf and is about 95 in this, appearing around 24. She has long brown hair and green eyes, her patron is a fiend named Wendonai.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The door creaked open, a noticeable sound that, this time, went ignored in the busy tavern. The girl that stumbled through was tall and slight, with brown hair peeking from beneath her hood and keen green eyes that scanned the room. Relaxing slightly as no one took notice of her, Cedar slipped into the booth across from her client. </p><p>The client was short and light-haired, with a round face and paint-soaked soft hands that characterized an artist. Leaning forward nervously, the city’s most prominent painter asked, “Did you get it?”</p><p>Leaning forward in kind, feeling pleasantly hidden while tucked away in the corner booth, Cedar nodded. “I got it.” She pressed a little sack containing a powder, and watched the young woman’s face light up.</p><p>“Thank you! Thank you, lady, you’ve saved me. The minister refuses to have his portrait done in anything but purple, and I simply couldn’t find… nevermind that. How much do I owe you?”</p><p>“150 gold should do it.”</p><p>“Yes… yes here.” The artist tucks a small sack of coins into Cedar’s palm, before nodding and scurrying out of the tavern. Cedar rose from the booth, too tired to want a drink, even in celebration. It was a job well done, and Cedar took a moment to feel good about it. She knew her father would’ve scoffed at her, rolled his eyes at the little magic she had used, and mocked that the only enemies she fought in her little quests were bandits, but Cedar saved that girl from having to make the journey and fight someone herself, and that was enough.</p><p>Making her way back to the inn she was staying at, Cedar cut through a back alley. It was long past dark, and even if she was typically seen as an easy target for most, Cedar could hold her own in this little city with her magic. As Cedar made her way down the alley, a noise coming from a side alley startled her. It sounded almost like a shriek… then it came again, a definite cry for help.</p><p>Without much thought, Cedar ducked down the side alley, recklessly not looking around the corner, and came face to face with a tall, grizzled man holding a woman to him. In the split seconds before the man reacted, Cedar took in the details of the scene, from the woman’s dark hair to the way her eye was already turning black from a hit. </p><p>As the man’s eyes furrowed and he took a threatening step forward to confront Cedar, Cedar made up her mind. If this were any other situation, she would flee. Cedar wasn’t aggressive by nature, and didn’t like confrontation, but seeing the desperate look on the woman’s face, Cedar couldn’t stand by and do nothing. </p><p>Before she knew it, Cedar had the spell for Charm Person on her lips. For once, the spell flowed effortlessly, taking less effort than it ever had. Looking at the dazed look in the man’s eyes, Cedar felt a heady rush of success and smiled. Remembering the workings of the spell, how the man would now regard her as a trusted friend, Cedar looked him straight in the eyes. “Hey buddy, I don’t think you want to hurt that lady. Why don’t you let her go?”</p><p>The grizzled man looked down at the still-panicked woman. “But… why?”</p><p>Cedar cast around for an answer. “Well… we’re friends, right?”</p><p>Decayed teeth smiled at Cedar. “Y-yeah!”</p><p>“Well then,” lead the warlock, “you know that since we’re friends, I don’t want you to get in trouble. If you hurt her, you’ll get in trouble and they’ll lock you up, and we’ll never see each other again.”</p><p>The man looked so crushed at the idea of never seeing the woman he had just met ever again that Cedar almost felt bad for him, until she remembered what he had been doing to the woman. Then the feelings evaporated. Giving a slight nod, the man let the woman go and she rushed to Cedar, clinging to her arm.</p><p>Cedar kept her eyes on the target. “Good job! Now I know you must be really tired, so why don’t you go lay down? You deserve a rest after such a long day!”</p><p>Suddenly droopy-eyed, the man murmured, “you’re right, it’s been a long, long day,” and letting out a yawn he began making his way out of the alley, presumably heading home. </p><p>As Cedar turned to comfort the woman who had begun sobbing, she couldn’t help feeling a glow of pride and confidence that she had never felt before, and she fell asleep that night warm with the feeling of accomplishment.</p><p>==========</p><p> </p><p>It happened again, and again. To Cedar, who had been alone except for Melissa since her mother died, the accomplishment and self esteem she felt after saving someone on the dark streets of Grinehalia was a drug. </p><p>Robberies, illegal magic deals, Cedar was shocked by how much she saw. As time went on, Cedar began being known around town. Not by a name, or by any defining characteristics, but the townspeople knew someone was enchanting people in alleys.</p><p>Unfortunately, the part where Cedar was saving people was left out, but Cedar was unsurprised by that. </p><p>Cedar had noticed more and more of the men she stopped wore a small insignia. A sloppily painted star inside a red circle. It wasn’t on the rapists and two-bit thieves, and as more and more smugglers and more highly equipped criminals showed up Cedar realized that it was some kind of organized crime. </p><p>Cedar didn’t quite know how she ended up here, crouched behind a dumpster. She watched, wide eyed with dismay, from her smelly shelter as men with circled stars displayed on their clothing unloaded boxes. Cedar got a precious glimpse of the cargo as one lifted the lid of a crate to check its contents.</p><p>Swords, all different kinds lay inside. Some long, some barely bigger than a long knife, if the other boxes had similar contents there had to be several dozen of them. And there was something about them… something familiar. It made Cedar’s skin crawl.</p><p>A heavyset man with dark hair walked up to the man who had delivered the cargo, a short and stocky blonde. They argued for a minute, and Cedar heard only snippets of conversation, but what she did hear confirmed her theory. Growls of “if you bring the Guard down on us…” and “your pay is keeping your life-” fleshed out a worrying image. </p><p>For a moment, Cedar debated going to the guard. Handing this off to someone who could deal with it. But no. Those swords were magic- a magic linked to demons, the same aura that surrounded her patron. Not many people wanted demonic swords for good reasons. Those swords could shred the Guard, who were a few good natured people who frequented the tavern Cedar was staying at.</p><p>Cedar had caught glimpses of their lives from their errant words. Goran’s daughter was getting married soon, Kiera was out on maternity leave after having twins, Warren was having problems with the missus. They were people. People who had lives, who had families they had joined the town’s small Guard to protect.  Cedar couldn’t let them face criminals whose weapons vastly overpowered the Guard’s bows and short swords.</p><p>The last of the crates being offloaded from the wagon caught Cedar’s eye. Soon the weapons would be gone, and with them Cedar’s opportunity. It was now or never. </p><p>Without giving herself time to think, Cedar stepped out from behind the crate and pulled up her hood, leaving only the lower part of her face visible. Before the four men could react, Cedar loosed Eldritch Blast.</p><p>For a moment, Cedar let herself smile at the sensation of crackling energy gathering and leaving her palm before it hit the heavyset leader of the group. Not stopping to take in her work, Cedar cast Poison Spray at the nearest man.</p><p>That was when it all went to hell in a handbasket. Rather than be overtaken by poison, the man flinched back and coughed for a moment on the toxic smoke before shaking it off. Before Cedar could try again she found herself dodging a blow from another man’s club. Glancing around in a panic, Cedar realized that even though the leader was clearly hurt and clutching his side, the other four were gaining ground on her.</p><p>Quickly casting another Eldritch Blast, Cedar didn’t stick around to find out if it had worked. She sprinted away, nearly stumbling over her cape before getting her feet under her. Cedar made for the alley, running full-out with all the elven swiftness she could muster. She dodged around a corner and kept running, seeing a well-lit street ahead. If she could only make it into the open-</p><p>With a pounding heart, Cedar chanced a glance over her shoulder and was just in time to see an arrow slam into her shoulder. She was thrown to the dusty paving stones, feeling waves of pain from her shoulder and knees from the hard landing. Cedar didn’t have a moment to stop, though. The man she had failed to cast Poison Spray on was getting close, out of breath but angrily determined to take his sword to her.</p><p>Cedar scrambled back to her feet, soles pounding the pavers as she made for the end of the alley. Lungs burning, Cedar felt a rush of relief as she sprinted into the lit main street, noticing the tavern just across the street. </p><p>Cedar didn’t stop, running for the relative safety of the tavern where the Guard’s presence would deter the criminals from chasing her inside. Her heart jumped in her chest as a thrown dagger clattered next to her foot where it had missed its mark, and Cedar put on a last burst of speed.</p><p>Reaching the safe shadow of the tavern, Cedar looked back to see the men retreating as the tavern door opened with Guards ready to make their way home. Breathing a sigh of relief, Cedar used the chaos to slip into the back of the tavern and make her way to her room.</p><p>==========</p><p>Cedar’s vision grayed out as the arrowhead came free from her shoulder. She choked off a sob at the blood she could feel dripping down her back and staining her now-ripped tunic. Cedar wrapped the last of her bandages around her wound, tying the gauze off clumsily.</p><p>A pit in Cedar’s stomach opened up as she realized she needed stitches. How could she stitch the back of her own shoulder? She couldn’t dress it herself, and Cedar couldn’t think of anyone she felt safe trusting to not arrest or harm her. </p><p>As she began to despair, a voice from behind Cedar distracted her from her plight. </p><p>“A fine mess you’ve gotten yourself in.”</p><p>“Wendonai!” Cedar yelped, jumping and jarring her shoulder. </p><p>“Mm, yes. You seem to need me to tell you not to pick fights you can’t win.”</p><p>Cedar winced. “I-I don’t…”</p><p>Wendonai settled on a rickety chair in the corner of the cheap inn room. “You don’t need my counsel, warlock? With that hole on your shoulder?”</p><p>“I was trying to stop-”</p><p>“Yes, yes.” Wendonai rolled his eyes. “Stop the big, bad magic weapons from being sold to the bad guys. But what did you actually do? Throw two cantrips at them, one that didn’t work at all, and one that didn’t even kill its target.”</p><p>“I…” </p><p>“Look, Cedar. I’m all for you doing some fighting. You don’t get more powerful by running the little chores you have been doing. If you don’t actually use the powers I gave you, they’re going to waste, and we don’t want that. But c’mon Cedar, I expected you to be smarter than that.”</p><p>Cedar gave up her weak protests and just looked at Wendonai, missing the cruel delight in his eyes and only seeing his carefully projected disappointed criticism. </p><p>She opened her mouth to say something, then clutched her shoulder and groaned. Cedar felt light headed, and suddenly knew she was about to pass out.</p><p>Noticing her plight, Wendonai snapped his fingers, and Cedar felt a searing pain in her shoulder. A cry was wrenched out of her throat as her shoulder burned and bubbled, and when she wincingly touched her hand to her wound, Cedar realized Wendonai had cauterized it. </p><p>Wendonai raised an eyebrow. “What? Look, healing isn’t my thing, be grateful you’re not bleeding out anymore.”</p><p>“Thanks,” Cedar said, trying not to let sarcasm bleed into her voice. Wendonai didn’t seem to notice. </p><p>“Well sweetheart, I’ve got stuff to do. Stay out of trouble.” </p><p>Then he was gone, and Cedar was alone in her tiny inn room. </p><p>==========</p><p>Cedar was back in the alleyway. Perhaps it was stupid, like Wendonai said, to keep fighting when she could barely cast a decent spell on a good day, but the burning in her shoulder spurred her forward. </p><p>Cedar had never felt like this before, never felt like she needed to see something through so badly it ate into her. Something told Cedar that this was important, and if she could just fight these thugs, stop this arms deal, it would… do something. Cedar wasn’t quite clear on why it was important, only that she felt like everything- her family, her weak magic, her loneliness, would make sense if she could only win this battle.</p><p>So, Cedar would win. </p><p>Of course, it wasn’t quite as simple as saying she would win, which was why Cedar was crouched in the shadows of a different alleyway, this time. Around the corner Cedar could see the same group of men she had fought last night loitering on the side of the quiet street. They grumbled to each other, restless. Cedar took a measure of satisfaction from how on guard they were.</p><p>Noticing a pile of masonry and stone from a construction project laying in the alley, Cedar got an idea. She summoned Mage Hand and used it to hold a small pile of bricks high up in the alley. </p><p>With her simple trap set, Cedar edged out of the alley, and paused, not sure what she should do. Should she shout a taunt, or launch a spell into the group?</p><p>The options were taken out of her hands when the four men noticed her standing by the alley and gave chase. Cedar darted into the alley, shouts of “there she is!” and “I’m gonna kill that bitch!” following her. </p><p>Cedar carefully ran under her mage hand, glancing upwards as she passed underneath. Whirling around, she forced herself to hold steady and not flee like she wanted to as the men ran at her. Timing it carefully, Cedar dodged an arrow from the group’s bowman and let Mage Hand dissipate. The bricks came crashing down.</p><p>For a moment, Cedar stared in horror. The bricks might not have been very heavy, but they were still bricks, and dropped from a few floors up had enough momentum to do a lot of damage. All of the men but the bowmen were now either stunned or unconscious, laying on the ground. One had blood running from his badly broken nose, and another had a dent in his forehead from the impact. The last man was the one Cedar had hit with Eldritch Blast yesterday, and from how still his chest was, Cedar guessed he was dead.</p><p>She was snapped out of her regret when she had to dodge another arrow. Aiming carefully, Cedar hit the bowman with an Eldritch Blast, and when he collapsed to the ground, a large electrical burn on his chest, Cedar couldn’t do anything but stare at him, wide-eyed.</p><p>Of the four assailants that Cedar had challenged, there was only one that Cedar could definitively say wasn’t dead. The leader was dead, the bowman was very still after being hit with Eldritch Blast, and Cedar couldn’t tell if the man who had been hit with a brick in his forehead was still breathing. She was afraid to find out.</p><p>Backing away, Cedar kept her eyes on the dead men until she had to turn away to retch. She breathed heavily, staring at the alleyway’s bricks and trying to think through the fog in her head.</p><p>Suddenly Cedar broke through the numbness, and was hit by a wall of guilt. She had just killed all these people. And sure, they were ready to hurt or kill her, but they were people. And she had murdered them in cold blood.</p><p>Cedar felt cold. She had felt so confident, so sure that what she was doing was right. And now there were dead bodies in the alleyway a few feet from her.</p><p>==========</p><p>She was throwing items into her bags and it hit Cedar that she didn’t know how she got there from the alley. Cedar kept packing her few things, picking up her bags without so much as a backwards look at the inn room she had been living out of for nearly a month. Picking up her bag, she nearly ran from the building, skirting through the tavern and avoiding questioning eyes.</p><p>Then she was stumbling down cobbled streets, shying away from alleyways as visions of still chests and bloody faces floated before her. Cedar’s daze garnered dirty looks that morphed into her father’s and sister’s faces before settling back into strangers’ faces.</p><p>She hit the treeline, and kept going. Branches scratched Cedar’s face and brambles tugged at her pants, but she kept moving, kept running.</p><p>Slow clapping brought her up short. “Bravo, what a performance.” the familiar voice dripped with scalding sarcasm.</p><p>Panting, Cedar turned to face Wendonai leaning languidly against a tree trunk. “I…” she had nothing to say. Cedar felt both empty, of what little magic she had had and yet ready to break out of her skin to escape the crushing grip of guilt on her insides.</p><p> “Y’know, when I said you had to be smarter about fighting that wasn’t quite what I meant, sweetheart.”</p><p>“I wanted to help,” Cedar croaked, “I didn’t want them to hurt anyone.”</p><p>Wendonai pushed himself up off the tree, and circled Cedar, observing her. “And who exactly did you help? The guy who slowly suffocated on his own blood thanks to you crushing him and breaking his nose? The archer you blasted whose daughter won’t see her father again? Who did you actually help?”</p><p>“I-”</p><p>“Nobody, that’s who. You stuck your nose where it didn’t belong and you got four people killed.”</p><p>Cedar tried her hardest to draw in enough air, and despite knowing she was perfectly fine she couldn’t seem to take a deep breath.</p><p>Wendonai unexpectedly stepped into Cedar’s personal space and cradled her face with his right hand. He grinned at her. “Well, no matter how sloppy that was, it was a step in the right direction. Don’t worry, sweetheart,” Wendonai cooed, “you’ll get better.”</p><p>“B-better?”</p><p>Wendonai cast a surprised look at Cedar, who missed its falsity. “Why of course, Cedar, you can’t stop now. You’re a killer. It’s part of you, and it’s the only way you’ll get enough power to ever really be useful.”</p><p>Wendonai turned the grasp on her face into a shove, and by the time Cedar hit the ground he was gone.</p><p>Cedar knew Wendonai was right, and surrendered to shuddering sobs that wracked her shoulders, not bothering to move from where she lay on the ground.</p><p>Wendonai cast one last look at Cedar invisibly, and smirked. Cedar was coming along nicely, she just needed a little push. One Wendonai would gladly give her.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey everyone, if you're a subscriber and you've made it this far, sorry this isn't my usual fanfiction. I wrote this story for another character in our dnd group, B^2, and I will be releasing other stories featuring other characters in our party. Please drop a kudos if you enjoyed, or even a comment!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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